ѳ · § · thoughts in the night · § · ѳ

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beware the thoughts that come in the night

they’ll drive you mad in broad daylight

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everywhere you turn

worn out faces

desperation in their eyes

tears so salty  …bittersweet…

making puddles at their feet

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be careful! be cautious!

don’t look too closely

into those eyes

lest they pull you in

…never to be seen again

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beware the thoughts that come in the night

they’ll drive you mad in broad daylight

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lie upon your bed

in the dark of night

deadly quiet

don’t think…  don’t dream…

don’t risk temptation’s gleam

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for along that path

no good to be found

…no heart’s desire…

only yearnings never to be cured

merely endured

· ѳ ·

beware the thoughts that come in the night

they’ll drive you mad in broad daylight

ѳ · § · ѳ

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inspired by the song “Mad World” as sung by Adam Lambert {video with lyrics}

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this is my submission for ~

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One Stop Poetry Form ~ Free Verse   at    One Stop Poetry

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The Poetry Pantry #52  at  Poets United
{submit an old or new poem}
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Poetry Potluck   .  at  .   Jingle Poetry
prompt:   Inspired by a song

inspired by the song “Mad World” as sung by Adam Lambert {video with lyrics}
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Mag 68   .  at    Magpie Tales
prompt:  image above
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Prompt #270 at Sunday Scribblings
prompt:   sweet

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Prompt 171   .  at    One Single Impression
prompt:   endure

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Prompt #108   .  at    Carry on Tuesday
prompt:   “beware thoughts that come in the night”

the first sentence from William Least Heat-Moon’s novel ‘Blue Highways’
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i am participating in ~

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NaBloPoMo

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Post A Day
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42 Comments

Filed under Jingle Poetry, Magpie Tales, music, NaBloPoMo, One Single Impression, one stop poetry, photographs, poetry, poetry form, Poets United, Post-A-Day2011, Sunday Scribblings

42 responses to “ѳ · § · thoughts in the night · § · ѳ

  1. moondustwriter

    Goodness Dani – I’m not closing my eyes tonight
    fun Free Verse

    Moonie (eyes wide open) hugs

  2. You’ve done it again!! Great work! :-)

  3. I thought this was innovative, cool, and very much a song. I am not sure it qualifies as free verse though. This feels structured with regular rhymes, regular rhythms and a consistent meter throughout. Next week work on “letting go” of the classical poetic elements and work on more interior poetic devices. Great poem but probably not a free verse one.

    • you are SO right! it’s really funny because i never rhyme unless i’m attempting a poetry form which requires it and then it doesn’t feel like my words. i do have repeat lines or beginning of lines fairly often for emphasis or rhythm. the rhyme in the first verse of this was by accident and it just went from there. {smile} thank you for your encouragement and i will make another attempt next week. i really appreciate the features at One Stop Poetry and all of you wonderful people behind it. thank you! ♥

  4. Helen

    I love, love, love Adam Lambert and feel equally mushy about your Magpie!

  5. My goodness, you did well writing one poem for all of these sites. Well done! (I saw your link at Carry on Tuesday.)

  6. Yes I can relate, my thoughts often carry from night to day.

  7. wow, amazing flow.
    it is sing song alike.
    have fun!

    • this was my favorite Poetry Potluck prompt! i often use music as an inspiration and this was really fun. thank you for all of your encouragement, Jingle. i can’t tell you how much i appreciate it. ♥

  8. only yearnings to be endured…yep…nice…

  9. I love the repeating line this really amazing

  10. Yes they will drive you mad in broad day light…

  11. I love that song. And your picture is great!
    The refrain really carried along the pace of the poem. I enjoyed it.

  12. Intriguing word choices (within a old-fashioned rhyme structure) and use of refrain stanzas = fun memorability.

    • thank you, Steve! {and you know i never rhyme!} your three words weren’t up yet when i wrote this or i would have tried to incorporate them. {smile} i appreciate your visit and comment.

  13. Kay Salady

    I especially liked these lines:
    “…no heart’s desire…

    only yearnings never to be cured

    merely endured” Very nice!

  14. I loved the line about being driven mad in broad daylight…

  15. Clear message of warning about night thoughts. I like the way you used the song as a guide.

    • thank you, Victoria. i could probably write at least two or three more poems using the song as a prompt. i really love it, especially sung by Adam Lambert. i appreciate you visiting and kind comment. ♥

  16. Excellent job. Can’t beleieve you covered so many bases. Loved the repetiion in the poem; really drove the image home.

    http://henryclemmonspoet.blogspot.com/2011/06/beware-carry-on-tuesday.html

    • thank you, Henry! i tend to use repetition in my longer verse one way or another. the prompts actually fit in with what i wanted to write rather than the other way around ~ even the photograph. i appreciate your visit and kind comment.

  17. haiku love songs.. I love this song.. here is my song, Somebody’s me

    Someone is Special

  18. Enjoyed your poem very much. Your creation of the chorus that incorporates the quote from Carry on Tuesday is very well done.

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